Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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