so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
