Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
