Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
