Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
