i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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