I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Randomize