i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize