Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
