I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
it was like eating out sand paper
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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