I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize