yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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