he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
