It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
