i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize