Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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