We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
