quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
