I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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