Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
