Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
