The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
