First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
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