It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
