I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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