Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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