i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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