Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize