Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
