my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
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