Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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