I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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