I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
