He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize