Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
