Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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