I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
