i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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