I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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