I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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