fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize