is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
