Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
