STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
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