I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
