The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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