I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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