I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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