Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
