Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
